Wedding Vows: The Remix
When my husband and I got married, we decided to ditch the traditional wedding vows. Intent upon entering a union that was was strictly defined by our own individual and collective needs, we abandoned the oppressive and contractual language so prevalent in traditional wedding vows, and opted to go with vows that TRULY meant something to US.
Almost 2 years into our marriage, and I still think about these vows on an almost daily basis and really think the sentiment and intention expressed in these vows, is what keeps our marriage, fresh, dynamic, and full of mystery and fulfillment. They are:
1) Will you place a high premium on the bond of friendship that you have with your husband/wife, and strive to afford him/her the space and freedom necessary for him/ her to continue walking his/her individual path?
2) Will you be attentive to the spiritual, physical, mental, and emotional desires of both yourself and your wife/husband, striving always to never put the needs of one over the needs of the other, but rather working together to ensure that both parties feel honored?
3) Will you invest all of your energies into your wife/husband, forsaking all others and thus realizing the tremendous potential that a life long commitment has to offer?
4) Will you embrace your wife/husband in both her/his highest moments of self realization and in the midst of her/his darkest internal conflicts, realizing that in both paths, she/he can be born anew through the freedom of love’s unyielding yet flexible bonds?
5) Will you commit to a life long evolution of self, thus ensuring that your mutual growth will stave off stagnation and ensure continued interest, mystery, and discovery for the sake of both yourself and your husband/wife?
6) Will you utilize this union with your wife/husband as an opportunity for mutual growth and expression, taking advantage of opportunities to correct every misconception that the two of you ever had about yourselves and each other?